Aphelion

This is a near-pro quality piece (I'm guessing it was a near miss in a few paying markets before it landed here) with the tropes of a 'classic' cyberpunk story (cybernetic implants, warring corporations) blended with a "Total Recall" setting. Tough guys and tougher women do whatever it takes to survive on the fringes of a Martian colony where their skills (if any) are worthless. Colonists are expendable pawns of multinational (in this case, multiplanetary) conglomerates, but these pawns manage to stay one step away from defeat by trying (occasionally, at least) to treat each other as human beings.<br><br>Could be a chapter in a longer work?<br><br>

You ask for comments, you get what you asked for...<br><br>Really a good, detailed world to tell your story in. I'm always drawn to a carefully crafted setting.<br><br>Likewise, good tone, good word choice to sound like a character on the ragged edge of burnout and/or drug addiction. That's not easy.<br><br>The only part that lost me is, if they were going to take off just as it hit, how did they get so high up when it happened?<br><br>Otherwise, I liked it.<br><br>Nate

Would you mind if I quoted your comments on my site?

<br><br>The concept that my opinion would sway others is a bit mind-boggling to me, but feel freel to quote away.<br><br>(Naturally, I'll be seeing my percentage soon, right? ;D --Just kidding!)<br><br>Nate

Shucks and wah-zoo, why would I mind? As long as them bribes keep a-comin' on time, you can do whatever you want with words written about your work. Oops -- I guess I should have put the 'bribes' part in a private message.<br><br>But seriously, the only objection I'd have would be if you did the classic movie ad campaign trick where you quote a review but you leave out words -- e.g., omitting 'definitely not' from the phrase 'definitely not worth reading' -- or if you quote raves written about somebody else's work!<br><br>Robert M.