Private Eye by E.S Strout

Tell us what you thought abou thte November issue!
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Megawatts
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Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM
Location: Johnstown, Pa.

Post by Megawatts »

I liked it!! The building could have been better, but the ending had a nice twist to it.

The writing was good, the character's Okay, and the story held my interest. I love the humor.

Giving the characters more liveliness and bickering might have set the ending up better. Especially, if two were betting on what the gap really was and calling each other idiots. If each felt he/she were so right that a couple of hundred dollars was flashed before the other scientist present, then more tension might have been felt as the story neared the end.

I'm sure there are other techniques to enhance the middle of the story, and maybe others will suggest some.

I like all of the author's story. :wink:

Nice job!! Nice un-expected twist at the end!!!
Tesla Lives!!!
Megawatts
Master Critic
Posts: 948
Joined: December 31, 1969, 08:00:00 PM
Location: Johnstown, Pa.

!

Post by Megawatts »

E. S. Strout, I am certainly going to keep an eye out for more of your stories! Just had to get that one in!
Tesla Lives!!!
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