Music Man by Bruce Memblatt

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Lester Curtis
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Music Man by Bruce Memblatt

Post by Lester Curtis »

I got distracted by a couple of little glitches in this story, such as "free-er" . . . the correct spelling is "freer" (and maybe too simple to believe) -- also, "Avenue A and forth street."

The thing is, though, this story has a very attractive quality to it; it uses repeating themes about light, such as:
The red setting sun bleached through the buildings surrounding the intersection like cracked ice under a bed of bourbon.
and:
But the light in the room, there was something about that dim light that brushed against his skin like waves of change, like something was about to happen.
as well as the repeating theme of breaking glass, and it all sets a mood that is poetic and surreal, vaguely threatening but not definable. The contrast of themes suggests danger and hope.

This all produces a very effective but subtle atmosphere, and builds gently to the climax at the end, which I was a little surprised at, but not disappointed with -- at all.

Bruce, watch your spelling and punctuation -- the little details do matter -- but keep listening to your muse. Very nice work.
I was raised by humans. What's your excuse?
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Robert_Moriyama
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Re: Music Man by Bruce Memblatt

Post by Robert_Moriyama »

In my acceptance note, I described the story as the Apocalypse narrated by a beat poet (or something to that effect). The free-flowing, sometimes under-punctuated prose was a major factor in achieving that effect, so I mostly left it alone...
You can't wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club.

Jack London (1876-1916)
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